She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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