the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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