dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
