My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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