so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize