My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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