It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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