Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
