I am puke
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
