Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
