i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Randomize
