Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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