you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
