Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
