Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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