Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize