just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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