do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
