brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
