no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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