No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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