Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize