there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
