Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Operation Purity has been aborted
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
