we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize