I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
