i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
