It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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