ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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