This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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