I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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