Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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