Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
