i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
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