she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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