What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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