i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Randomize