Kiss
Puke
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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