How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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