White coat. Heels.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
