why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
