I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
