i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
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