People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
