Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Randomize
