Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize