i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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