how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
