Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize