This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you would pick up someone in the library
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
